Dr. Bloom finally shared with significant people in his life that we have completed our homestudy and preliminary dossier documents for #3 (Some have known for sometime for practical reasons, and while they think we are crazy they have been wise enough not to say so). The Blooms were not pleased.
"Do you know what you're getting into?" one pivotal person asked. I responded, "Did you know what you were getting into when you got pregnant with each of your children? Children are always a surprise, and we're looking forward to that again." What I wanted to say was "I know! That's what I wanted to ask SIL when she announced her pregnancy, but I controlled myself!" (with a smile -- because I really am guilty of thinking that same thing).
I'm not sure I know what the question means -- do we know what it's like to parent three? (of course not yet) do we know the potential medical challenges of our child to be? (not yet, but we're as educated as anyone can be about the conditions to which we've opened ourselves) have we considered that family members who are willing to babysit two Bloom children might not be willing to babysit three? (this is not a real problem as we don't go out) . . .
More than last time, we DO know what we are getting into. So many lessons we've had to learn about being an unconventional family have already been learned. We've prepared twice for a child with medical/developmental special needs, and while our children have surprised us with their perfect health, that preparation could come in handy this time. We've learned to play zone defense.
Pregnancy and adoption are not comparable, and it saddens me when prospective adoptive parents try to make adoption intelligible to others by comparison with pregnancy. Yet there are times when the tact necessary for engaging with a pregnant woman is also necessary for engaging with an expecting adoptive mother. This is one of those times, one of those times when "congratulations" is appropriate even if you don't mean it.