Friday, November 16, 2007


Our loved one died in her sleep last night, very comfortably and quietly they say (do they ever say otherwise? But we believe them because it was hospice care). We are so sad for her family, and sad for our loss, but we also know that her death honors her wishes.
If you haven't had this conversation with the ones you love and some others you trust, I encourage you to do so. It doesn't guarantee that everyone will listen, but it's worth the effort to try to be heard.

I have a whole lot of adoption-related things on my mind (I hear you, my friends -- what you are talking about also must be heard) but I just can't speak to it right now. I hope you understand.


Judy said...

I'm sorry for your loss. Though it was ultimately how she wanted it, how you helped her (bless you for being there for her), damn if it still doesn't hurt. I know it does.

There is an incredible quiet dignity in someone taking their last breath quietly and peacefully, and yes, that can actually be how someone passes. I know all too well what a mixture of relief and grief there is when this happens, when your loved one isn't suffering anymore, when your own prayers of "Dear God, please don't let this person suffer anymore" are answered, yet that leaves you without that person in your life physically anymore . . . and the realization comes that death is so very final.

I apologize for going on so.

Mostly I wanted to give you my unwavering support and friendship.

With love,

Charity said...

I'm sorry for your loss...I'd just like to let you know that I find it wonderful to cross paths with another thinker extraordinaire...God bless..

Nicki Mann said...

I'm very sorry for your loss! I work as an activity aide in a nursing home, so I see people going through this every day and I have also gone through losing quite a few people there that I'd gotten attached to! When people are in hospice, their passing is always such a strange thing, because on one hand you know that they were in pain, that their experience on earth was no longer comfortable and that they deserve better... but on the other hand, you know you are going to miss them so much!
I'll be keeping you in my thoughts!

MomEtc. said...

I'm sorry for your loss.

erin said...

I echo the sentiments of the other posters -- so, so sorry for your loss, but thankful that there are hospices to help us leave this earth comfortably and with dignity.

love and peace to you and your family.